More experiences and thoughts to share

I thought I would continue to share my post-AB experiences and changes, especially because I think they have gotten quite interesting.

I think, many times throughout each day, that I fell too deeply down the rabbit hole (and too quickly). I wanted to say this because there are many new students to Asetianism (including myself) and I think it's vital to stay grounded during this lifelong learning experience, or mental instability is going to knock you on your rear end.
Throughout my own research efforts, I have uncovered a lot of disturbing things that have completely broken the illusion of my previous life. And I wanted to extend gratitude toward Luis Marques and the AB for helping me See a little more clearly. I am now redoubling my grounding and centering efforts because, with every new little detail I uncover, I feel like I might fully lose my mind. There is no escape, and the AB, a beautiful and terrible metaphysical tool, changes you forever. There is no going back... there is only lying to yourself, or accepting reality and truth once the sleeping spell is broken.
And I have also fully realizing and understanding the Asetian principle of silence. To me, in my personal life, it has taken on an entirely new and important meaning. I know now that I need to learn in silence. I have attempted to voice my new findings and knowledge to people closest to me (however limited it may be in comparison to many other occultists) and it has resulted in nothing but them thinking I am a nutcase, an overly-paranoid conspiracy theorist. And, while opinions ultimately do not matter, I realized how important it is to disregard everything that is not your true Will.
One of the hardest things for me to accept has been the fact that some of the people I love the most aren't ready for the truth... and that my concern cannot help them. Some people will always remain so deeply entrenched in their own false realities that it is a permanent situation.
This has led me into some of the deepest confusion I have ever experienced in my life... how to proceed? Who to trust? Do I even love these people at all? What does that word even mean?

Anyway, sorry for the long, rambling nature of this post, and thank you to anyone who read it

I thank you for posting this Since the beginning of actually finding THIS forum ( witch i found by accident), my life has turned up side down… and sanity went out the window a long time ago ….
I kinda feel like I am slipping in and out of reality…
And Now i don't know What is reality anymore…

To be honest I completely hate feeling like this, it been nothing but a loooooong roller coaster, and Im even beginning to wonder if i have multiple personalities ….

If I do or if I don't … I really do need to find out …
And if I am, I will seek help for it.

So if I do have multiple personalities, I do apologize for my strange ramblings.