Help needed

by Marisha 19.05.09 9:58

Hello everyone,

I'm ne to this site, I just signed up yesterday, but I'm asking for your help.
The last days I have noticed that I a msomething more or less than human, I just can't figure out what.
I don't feel a special craving for blood, neither does there seem to be any physical difference. All i know, is that my Soul doesn't seem to fir my body, my mind is very confused and easily distracted. I'm bored very easily and can't seem to focus on anything I do. I also think that I'm more sensitive the the energies of the earth than most people, and i don't function too well in big groups of people. I tend to be very shy, but at the same time my thoughts are very bold, daring.
I don't exactly know how to describe this feeling, all I know is that I want to know what I am. I'd love to hear anyone's opinion,
Thank you for your help.

Sincerely,
Marisha

by Marisha 19.05.09 10:01

Sorry, my keyboard doesn't seem to function properly. Let me post some corrections
1. new
2. I am something
3. fit

by Daniel09 19.05.09 15:37

Welcome Marisha. You'll find we're very understanding here.

Now for my personal views in the form of sentences with many commas. I believe that the best identity for what a person is, needs to be searched for no further than the tip of your nose. What you are is who you are, you. Take for example, me. I'm Daniel, that is my identity, who I am and what I am.

For a long while, I did not know this. I built a shell around my body and soul, rejecting who I was, and became vampiric as a result, teething as if I was a child and craving blood. Naturally, I turned to the internet and was introduced to none other than the vampire community. This served as an identity for me and I embraced it, unknowingly molding myself to experience every symptom of vampirism. It held for some time, but I kept becoming worse and worse, getting so depressed that I was to the point I wanted to kill myself multiple times. Then I was opened up by my friend to the fact that I was repressing myself, and the mental tax of doing that is what causes depression and such. I instantly lost my vampirism, my depression, and my insecurities about liking what I like (I'm bisexual with asexual tendencies). Soon after, I began to learn more about myself and realized that it is not just who I am, but what I am. The best identity is yourself, no matter how weird you are.

Examples of my weirdness include, but are not limited to: uncontrollable running urges, ability to hold extended conversations with trees and the wind, fluctuating eye color ranging from gray to yellow-gold with gray edges, extreme flexibility, super-memory of things I learn, prophetic dreams, obsession with secrecy especially in code writing, intuitive healing abilities for mild pain, artistic savvy, and an imagination that can be tapped for entertainment because it's active without my control.

I think you might find there's not much weird about you in all actuality. Smile

by Karnath 19.05.09 15:39

Greetings, Marisha, and welcome to the forum.

I don't know if we can be of any help with so little information. What do you know about vampirism, and which are the reasons behind your approach to the forum?
From what do you feel you differ from the others? And what do you like to study, what do you like to do, what are your dreams about, etc?
You will have to make good analysis, be true to yourSelf, so you can figure something out, and so you can evolve.

Why don't you tell us a bit more about yourself, for a better start?

Best regards,
Karnath.