Introduction

I'm new here. I'm here because I think I may be a psychic vampire, but I feel quite certain I am not an asetian or a descendant of any long-standing coven or tribe or order of vampires.

I'm not super experienced with the occult but have been interested for a long time. I started dabbling in Wicca at the age of 14, quit that in college, picked up some books on LHP type spirituality, quit that around age 29, and now am unsure what to pick back up again. I find myself drawn more to magic and occultism than to deities and religion, but it's so hard to find those not inherently bound together.

Why do I think I'm a vampire? Basically because I do better when receiving energy from others and have a harder time when I am unable to do that. It's not an "I burn in the sunlight and hate garlic" type of reason, I swear.

I read someplace that you all can be wary of newcomers, so I hope this message isn't adding to that in any way.

Welcome. Thanks for introducing yourself to the community.
I see you quit Wicca. I don't blame you there, as the whole thing always seemed a bit fluffy to me and lacking in substance. There were some threads around here about Gerald Gardner, I think, though I've lost track of where they are.

If you're interested in witchcraft, I've heard of Primal Craft being a very good system to pick up. Though I have not studied it myself yet, as the books seem somewhat difficult to get my hands on. Still, I definitely cannot deny how attractive these works look! Maybe you could give it a try or research into it.
When it comes to vampirism, I still maintain that the Violet Throne is the best reference.
Maybe others will be able to chime in with good LHP references.

Thank you, Rhea. I am curious about something.

Is the Asetian Bible/Violet Throne still useful if you are not an Asetian or don't think you could be one? If so, I'd consider reading to learn as much as I can anyhow.

Doesn't look like I can edit my post to add much. I found I had a fundamental disagreement with the major book on the LHP that made it pretty inaccessible to me, so I'm not too keen on looking for resources on that at present, but that could change eventually.

Oh, of course. The Asetianist path is embraced by many people of varying natures. Though it is certainly not for everyone, and the only way to decide if it is right for you is to look into it personally. If you would like to look at introductions of their works and see how they resonate with you, they can be found at the official website of the Order, as well as some highly valuable articles that can serve as a great reference even if you do not wish to purchase their works.
http://www.asetka.org/index.shtml
Of course, Asetianism is not easy or remotely safe by any means... but that is a matter for a different thread. If you have an open and curious mind, I think you might enjoy it. If you decide to look into it, I wish you happy reading and be sure to drink from the source above any other information about it.

Doesn't look like I can edit my post to add much. I found I had a fundamental disagreement with the major book on the LHP that made it pretty inaccessible to me, so I'm not too keen on looking for resources on that at present, but that could change eventually.

Might I ask what book that was, that you took issue with? Many books about the Left Hand Path are more about the author's ego than any pillar of darkness, and the market is flooded with them.

The book was "Lords of the Left Hand Path." My issue was the dismissal of ritual abuse as a real thing. I have no doubt that many supposed cases were made up and that the Christian right sort of exaggerates how many instances of it are Satanic in nature and somehow an attack on Christianity, but I'm also a survivor of RA and just ugh...being an occultist who's a survivor of that is a tough line to walk for that reason.

The ego thing is also a problem I've run into a lot.

I think it just becomes a matter of wading through all of the nonsense in search for the genuine. Don't let literature containing misconceptions get in the way of your path if you are serious about learning, try to keep going. There are good sources to learn from even if not strictly "dark" as well, and I'd argue that study of those helps to really understand the left side of the path in a clear way.

This is probably good advice. I've had trouble with running into real nonsense as I've researched. There was a website that had some good information about dark Paganism once, but its bookstore was all pro-Hitler/Nazi propaganda. It's frustrating.

As for why I left Wicca, the biggest reason was that the highest and most holy of things is the union between male and female, and I'm a lesbian and felt alienated by that. I end up wanting a religion that isn't so gendered if I want a religion at all.

Hello there and welcome to the community.

Concerning your question I would say that books like the Violet Throne are definitely useful even if you're not an Asetian. It's a pretty strong book on the occult, spirituality and metaphysics in itself, even to someone who doesn't follow the Asetian culture. Since you mentioned that you're suspecting to be a psychic vampire, the Violet Throne remains the best published source on vampirism to date.

Feel free to ask if you have further questions!

Hello and welcome. Interesting that you mentioned being alienated by the strong focus on the union between male and female found in Wicca, which is almost dogma in that current. I understand that you’re not particularly interested in Asetianism or Asetian spirituality and there’s nothing wrong with that, I just found that you might find a breath of fresh air in such tradition precisely from what you expressed in those words. The Asetian system is highly focused on  spiritual liberation and the unveiling of inner truth, the duality that you may find within it is purely metaphysical and it has nothing to do with a physical aspect such as males or females. In fact I believe that it might be one reason why I’ve found so many lesbians embracing this path for its uniqueness of approach. Besides the obvious detail that its founder was female: Aset.

Jonathan - You all make the book sound so amazing - I may just have to check it out once I am paid again.

Nightshade - It's not so much that I'm uninterested in Asetianism (I know nothing about it); I just doubt that I am a true Asetian and wasn't sure if I'd be wasting my time reading it if not. If it's a more useful approach to vampirism than say the Psychic Vampire Codex (which I didn't like very much), I might have to check it out.

I had the same experience concerning the Psychic Vampire Codex. Found it an extremely basic book that reflected more on the ego of the author than actually providing valuable occult material. Also, it might be of interest to reference that Michelle Belanger is a self-proclaimed "occult expert" that isn't really taken seriously by actual occultists as she uses the occult to make money profiting from the ignorant. Similar in ways to another author that demands to be called Father Sebastiaan, not even his real name but something fictitious designed to allure those interested in fake vampirism (roleplaying). Both have used concepts, theories and content from the Aset Ka and the works of Luis Marques wholesale, not to mention that they have campaigned against Asetianism time and time again, which was very interesting to observe. Frauds always try to silence those capable of exposing them for what they are.

About your concerns for the tradition, Asetianism is entirely open to anyone seeking it with an honest heart. Surely it might demand dedication, maturity and honesty, which isn't often easy and may even be painful when facing truths we didn't previously realize or unleash about ourselves. However you definitely don't need to be an Asetian to benefit from such wisdom, and you also don't need to pay for any silly fangs and vampire balls as in Father Sebastiaan's Sabretooth or buy into the expensive workshops of Michelle Belanger's House Kheperu.

Welcome and I hope you have a nice time around.